Subject: The Cancun theory

Posted by: Mystaque at 09/20/00 15:54

: If you haven't read or gotten a copy of Black Sun,then
: don't,it was a big waste of time.Basicaly this mini-series just sets
: up a possibly new monthly and I won't tell for who(you can
: probably guess).
:
: Why does Marvel keep doing this to us;this
: mini-series seemed like it would be interesting but all it did was
: regurgitate old material,though it may have closed up some dangling
: plot threads.
:
: I knew that I shouldn't have ordered in
: advance!Oh well since I have the entire run of the mini-series and have
: read/scanned it,I might as well enjoy what little of it that I can.
:
: Priest-*smacking head*and saying for the
: Zillionth time DON'T BUY INTO THE HYPEover and over
:
"Cancun" being one of the few Mexican resort-town names I can actually spell.

My theory goes like this: Marvel hires someone to write a ten-line super-hype capsule paragraph and another someone to draw (or, in the case of "Black Sun," paint) a very pretty cover image. They forward these things to Previews, snug as bugs in rugs in the knowledge that they now have a two-month gap between promising product and actually delivering it into the hands of the suckers--er, fans. Previews arrives at my comics store, I select goodies like "Black Sun" (saying, "Ooh, lookit the purty cover images!"), and Joe, my comics guy, ponies up the dough, pre-sale and up front, to pay for my advance order. Marvel then takes that money and does the figurative equivalent of running like hell for Mexico and sitting on a beach thumbing its nose at its heartily snowed fanbase (and their beleaguered comics shop owners) in the U.S. and elsewhere over a drink with a paper umbrella stuck in it. Meanwhile, I receive "Black Sun," or any other recent example of an utter Marvel snowjob, and buy it out of guilt, knowing that Joe can't return it.

I think the "Black Sun" covers and the recent "Millennial Visions" book are pointing straight at the Marvel of the (immediate) future: Who needs stories and art when you can get the same amount of money for air and hype?

Mystaque

Subject: Speaking of which....

Posted by: Mystaque at 09/20/00 19:09

From the land of sky-blue teasers. Found this little gem over at Comics Continuum, in reference to issue one thousand or so of the upcoming "Magik" mini:

"Magik and Nightcrawler unite with the demonic entities known as Dormammu and Mephisto. Will they be able to save Limbo--or will they simply destroy each other instead?"

Reaction number one: I WISH. Oh, jeepers, for something--ANYTHING--to happen--for comic-book-real--in ANY of these minidonuts!

Reaction number two (the real one, the serious, sophisticated one): AS IF. Oh, sure: Nightcrawler and "Let-me-call-you-Boobchen" are gonna be destroyed by Tabasco, or Babaloo, or the Big Kahuna, or whoever. Here, Marvel, I'll have six more legs grafted onto my stumpy self: PULL AWAY.

I'm *ahem* developing a serious dislike for these coyly questioning capsules. But I'm sure Marvel paid good money for the software that generates them, and I simply shouldn't read them anyway, if they upset me so.

Mm hm.

Mystaque

Subject: Deja vu again-again.

Posted by: Mystaque at 09/21/00 14:23

Once more, re: "Black Sun": Didn't we just have one of these "I can't hurt those hideous creatures, for they're really MY POSSESSED FRIENDS!" scenarios in Contest of Champions II? Not that I'm not all for a good old-fashioned corny body-swap plot now and again, but relying on my shortening attention span to swipe my dough twice in the same eighteen months for the same story is a little off.

I think. What was the question?

Mystaque